Ten signs that you’re a book hipster (a blog post you’ve probably never heard of)

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Ten signs that you’re a book hipster (a blog post you’ve probably never heard of)

Posted July 4, 2012 by Mark

Hipsters are a strange breed. It’s an identity that can’t be claimed, only denied. But if you deny it, it means you’ve been accused. And if you’ve been accused it’s because you’ve probably done something extremely hipster-ish, like used the phrase ‘probably never heard of them’ in relation to a band.

So I’ve compiled a list of the ten signs you’re a book hipster, just to be helpful. Feel free to disagree or add your own in the comments!

People call me a hipster all the time, but an online quiz told me I’m a borderline hipster at best. Who to believe?

1. You don’t want an ereader because you want other people to know what you’re reading

You see these people pretending to read paper books all the time. But really they’re glancing around the room, to see who’s noticing them.

2. You like to take instagram photos of your food…with your book casually in the background of the shot

Actually, I did this the other day.

3. You now appreciate the works Stephen King produced in the 80s (but everything he wrote in the 90s was terrible)

“The Shining is a brilliant interpretation of the American ghost story but Rose Madder was meaningless twaddle.”

4. You are purposefully rough with your books when you read them so that it looks like you’ve read them several times more than you actually have.

Not only have I read all the books I own, I’ve read them all at least seven times.

5. You think you’re Hemingway

You’re not.

6. You have personalised book plates that say “from the library of (insert name)”

You do not have a library. You have a bookshelf.

7. You have a book bag

Normal people call them ‘bags’.

8. You like to hang out in independent book stores, but secretly shop on Amazon.

You probably make purchases on your phone while you’re in there.

9. You snort derisively at any book that’s popular without having read it

*cough* 50 Shades of Grey *cough*

10. Unlike music hipsters, you need authors to be verified by a major label before you’ll read them.

Hipsters only like authors that you’ve never heard of…who are published by a major publishing house and who are preferably award winners.

Tagged: hipster, list

27 Comments

http://lifemerging.com/ Melissa

this is great!

http://twitter.com/ml_harding Mark Harding

Thank you!

http://twitter.com/popqueenie sj

1. My ereader has been my best friend for the last three years, but I don’t care if people know what I’m reading.

2. No instagram account.

3. Rose Madder was one of his best books! I do have problems with the last two doorstops he put out, though.

4. Well, I am rough on pBooks, but not on purpose. It’s one of the hazards of having children around.

5. Heh, nope – maybe I should start drinking more?

6. I would never do this, they’d lose value at the bookswap!

7. I carry a diaper bag as a purse, see #4.

8. I buy books wherever is closest, but I try to buy from the indies directly.

9. I’m a firm believer in the “I can’t make fun of it if I haven’t read/watched/heard it” rule.

10. All of my favourite books this year so far have come from small/indie/self-pubs.

…I have no idea what this makes me.

anon

a compulsive blog post commenter?
http://twitter.com/ml_harding Mark Harding

I think this makes you a reader, plain and simple!

http://www.becomingcliche.wordpress.com/ Heather

I think I might actually have a library. I have a lot of books.Maybe thousands. But no book plates. Clearly, I am lacking.

http://twitter.com/ml_harding Mark Harding

When you have thousands of books a book plate is probably your best line of defence against non-returning book borrowers.

Gillian

I’m not going to admit to having a check-out system for when people borrow my books.

Gillian

(I’m not a hipster though – to me hipsters are a style of jean)
http://twitter.com/tweetingtechno Tweeting Technology

And I’m not going to admit that my books are classified in Dewey Decimal.

http://twitter.com/oakenbookcase Angelya

I used to write my name in my books, but that was so that my thieving siblings wouldn’t pinch them!

http://twitter.com/annetreasure Anne Treasure

11. You have 18 copies of The Catcher in the Rye, in various languages.

http://www.momentumbooks.com.au/ Joel Naoum

Who would be weird enough to do that?

http://twitter.com/wordsbydan Daniel Dalton

Just me and the guy who shot John Lennon. Also I’m pretty sure number 5 was pointed in my direction.

http://twitter.com/annetreasure Anne Treasure

You probably think this blog post is about you. Hashtag solipsism.

http://twitter.com/wordsbydan Daniel Dalton

Hashtag get a new favourite word.

http://twitter.com/ml_harding Mark Harding

will whistling casually make me seem more, or less innocent?

http://twitter.com/wordsbydan Daniel Dalton

Both.
Nina

“This is like watching Hemingway write. Mark Hemingway.”

http://twitter.com/elspethallison Elspeth Allison

Read this aloud to a friend. She laughed often and gave me very pointed looks.

http://twitter.com/ml_harding Mark Harding

I showed this list to a friend of mine who is a MUCH bigger hipster than me. She said, ‘you realise this list pretty much describes you, right?’

Sue Bursztynski

Got an ereader on my iPad and love it, don’t take pictures of food or books, just eat and read, actually HAVE read favourite books so many times I have to buy another copy, so they don’t fall apart, don’t want to be Heminway, J.K.Rowling will do nicely and it would be SO nice to speak at writer events sometimes! Admit to the book plates, but mostly keep them for lending out books I want back or to sign books for overseas/interstate, do have a library, trust me on this! I have ever bought from Amazon, probably never will. I don’t deride what I haven’t read, but from what I hear, I will never read anything with a cough in either side. It just desn’t sound like my kind of book. Perfectly happy to read writers everyone has heard of and in Australia quite a few of those write fr small press

Sue Bursztynski

Hate, hate HATE prediction that leaves typos!

http://www.facebook.com/people/Wendy-Monaghan/100001286994405 Wendy Monaghan

1. I don’t have an e-reader, and I rarely read in public.
2. What’s ‘instagram’?
3. I’ve never read a book by Stephen King.
4. I always use a bookmark and never turn the covers back.
5. I don’t like Hemingway all that much.
6. I have a set of personalised book plates that were given to me as a gift. Would you like them?
7. I don’t have a book bag, but I made one each for my children for library day at school. Does that count?
8. I like to hang out in my local library.
9. I’ve reserved 50 Shades of Grey at the library. On a long wait-list.
10. I browse the library shelves, and choose books at whim.

I don’t think I’m a hipster …
http://twitter.com/CathieTranent Cathie Tranent

I don’t know whether this makes me a hipster or just weird ….

1. I have a copy of Stephen Hawking’s A Brief History of Time, which I bought just to leave on the coffee table and freak people out! Never thought about having it photobomb a shot on Instagram …

2. I also head straight to people’s bookshelves when visiting them for the first time – can tell you a lot about them. (As opposed to the books they “leave” on the coffee table for their own amusement) *see Point 1.
duckprint

This is brilliant! What are you favourite reads at the moment? These are mine –
http://www.duckprint.com.au/blog/books/
Hipsterius

El hipster de monterrey mexico usan ropa del stilo http://invertedtriangl3.com/

Ten signs that you’re a book hipster (a blog post you’ve probably never heard of)

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